April 1st: "Look Back" special edition -- 2022

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Today we bring you a pair of look backs to simpler times in all of our lives.

Owing to the complications and endless causes for tearful angst of this moment in history, we bring you:

(1) an almost complete* reprint of The Guide from April 1, 2014; and,

(2) the opening section AND READER COMMENTS from the edition from the same day, previous year, April 1, 2013.

We'll be back soon with musical convergences from the current time-space continuum. And please note our RECENT EDITIONS for the month or so ahead of this have PLENTY of musical opportunities that have not yet arrived.

Meantime, ENJOY the classic 2014 edition that got 41,000+ views the first day when it was originally published. (We can't determine the original reader count for the 2013 partial reprint.)

* - "almost complete" 2014 edition because all the illustrations, photos, jpgs, gifs, etc., have disappeared from the archived edition. All the text is there, and you'll still find it delightfully worth your time!

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Special Edition ~ April 1st ~ music & art & TV, April 1, 2014

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The Guide brings you a most special edition for today, April 1st.

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As always, we start with a quick nod to history.

April 1st in history…

√  Today is the birthday of Rachel Maddow, MSNBC and talk radio program host.

√  Today is the officially proclaimed (somewhere) “One Cent Day,” falling between “Bunsen Burner Day,” and “National Peanut Butter and Jelly Day.” (Seriously.)


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In this edition…

♪  NEWS FEATURES
.  √  DEERING ANNOUNCES IRON BANJO
.  √  DIGIPHART DEBUTS NEW HORNS THAT ANYONE CAN PLAY
.  √  WORLD NEWS WASHING-UP ON AUSSIE BEACHES
.  √  AKU STICK IS NEW FROM FENDER
.  √  “A PRAIRIE HOME COMPANION” SOLD TO LUTHERANS
.  √  NEW RECORD NUMBER FOR TV PLAYS OF ANNOYING JINGLE
.  √  FIDDLE PLAYER OFFERED PRESIDENCY – OF THE UNIVERSE
.  √  RED HOUSE RECORDS ANNOUNCES “REDS IN THE HOUSE”
.  √  MSNBC CHANGES NAME, KEEPS ABBREVIATION
♪  TICKET ALERTS
♪  ONGOING MUSIC & ART EVENTS
♪  TUESDAY’s MUSIC & ART EVENTS
♪  MUSIC-on-TV Tonight


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♪  April 1 NEWS FEATURES

#1 News Feature…

√  DEERING ANNOUNCES IRON BANJO

New model never requires tuning. Comes with welded strings.

Phil Plectrum is really excited about this one. He tells the Guide, “Lots of people make steel guitars. You can get ’em with or without pedals. But we have the only all-metal banjo. Not only that, but it’s the most durable instrument in the world. It’s made of cast iron.” 

“Back when National began making its famous all-steel resonator guitars with the cones, they missed one thing that was a real opportunity,” notes Phil. “They coulda welded the strings. Now, decades later, we’ve overcome that oversight. All Deering Cast Iron Banjos come with factory-welded strings. Not only do you never need to tune, but you can’t. Not without a cutting torch, anyway,” beams Phil, pointing to the new banjo.

Throughout this morning’s press conference in the parking lot at Deering’s Spring Valley (California) plant, Phil kept looking at the skies. In response to a question, he said he was not hunting for missing airliners, but it took some doing to get him to say why he was soon looking up once again.

“Uh, rain,” said Phil. “After all, it’s made of cast iron. We don’t want it to rust.”

The press debut did not include a demonstration. Seems the portable crane that Deering ordered didn’t show up, and no one was willing to risk a hernia from picking up the new instrument.

Still, Phil is hoping to establish a fresh identity by associating himself with the new Cast Iron Banjo. Phil Plectrum is still remembered as the musician who infamously once left his old, beater banjo on the back seat of his convertible, with the top down. He was hungry, and didn’t want to take time to mess with the top. Band members warned him to tend to it, because of crime. Sure enough, their worst fears were confirmed: when they exited the café, they found two more old beater banjos on the seat, alongside Phil’s. Local cops delayed the band’s departure for over an hour, taking fingerprints and photographs. Sheriff Jowls is still quoted: “I just don’t know who, in our town, would do such a terrible thing. This is up there with what my friend Officer Opie encountered in Massachusetts when that Arlo kid dumped a half a ton of garbage off that cliff. There’s no telling who might be a vindictive litterbug.”


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#2 News Feature…

√  DIGIPHART DEBUTS NEW HORNS THAT ANYONE CAN PLAY

Humphrey Bogart delivered, and then received back in his face, the famous movie line, "Just whistle. You know how to whistle, don't you. Just put your lips together and blow."

Now anyone – with absolutely no musical training or knowledge – can just put their lips together and blow a horn. That's any horn in the new Digiphart line, from the Trumpet to the Trombone to Professor Peter Schicekele's legendary Left-Handed Sewer Flute.

Thanks to modern technology, there's no need for that expensive Julliard or Berkeley or Colburn or New England Conservatory education. You don’t even need to practice, or know how to whistle. You just need to move air.

It was inevitable. With Digipharht, playing the horn is just as brainless as a keyboard making squishy, soulless drum imitations. Once the fake drum began to deprive real musicians of work, the demand from lazy slackers made it only a matter of time before the air guitar would be replaced by that fake thing that plugs into a computer, and that set the stage for Digiphart.

The company also plans a Pharmonica, once they figure how to make it suck as much as it blows.


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#3 News Feature…

√  WORLD NEWS WASHING-UP ON AUSSIE BEACHES

It was first said by David Serby two weeks ago: "I sure hope CNN finds that missing airliner soon, because I'm pretty sure all their world news is locked in its cargo hold."

What beachcombers found today is more than that. There are huge wooden crates marked "FOX News" and stenciled "Benghazi Scandal" and "IRS Scandal." All were tightly sealed and completely empty.

But more questions arose when the washed-up flotsam included packages marked "Anderson Cooper 360," addressed to "CNN 370." The onetime news network didn't change its name until after the airliner went missing. Still, the packages include hours of unaired material on Texas oil spills in the Houston Ship Channel; spreading damage to farms and polluted tap water from fracking; the faster-than-previously-believed rate of melt of Greenland and Antarctic ice sheets; the amounts of money being spent in the “Own Your Own Congressman” campaign by rich corporate moguls who inherited vast fortunes and opposes raising the minimum wage; the inside-interest scandals of two US Supreme Court Justices; the impact of toxins dumped into the Ohio River by a coal processing “energy” company; and dozens more neglected stories.

An insider, who spoke on conditions of anonymity, told the Guide that CNN will likely be months catching-up on all that lost news. Meantime, today they publicly denied any inspiration from their show named “AC 360” for renaming their network “CNN 370.”


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#4 News Feature…

√  AKU STICK IS NEW FROM FENDER

Big things are expected following today’s announcement of the new “Aku Stick” from Fender.

Like everything else from the famous maker of electric guitars, this new model plugs-in. But not like anything else. It has a 110-volt AC cord that plugs directly into any wall outlet.

“That’s really just for the lights,” admitted Sid Strunk, Chief of Special Strums at Fender. It took some doing to get him to reveal that the electric aspect of their new model has no musical function. “It sounds the same whether it’s plugged-in or not,” said Strum Chief Strunk.

“We just couldn’t see making an instrument that you didn’t need to plug-in to something,” he said.

There have been various “sticks” in music, and there once were high hopes that the “Chapman Stick” would catch-on big. But, despite a few fine players who do impressive things with it, it didn’t. Fender is gambling that its fans are ready for something they will find revolutionary.

Fender’s new Aku Stick comes with six strings, and they have one in the concept phase that would double that number, to twelve. It has an unusually large hollow body. They deny they’re just trying to get even for getting pranked by Gibson at this year’s NAMM Show. The Guide reported on that in our February 7 edition.

(You can check that out at the video link we gave you in that story, at:
http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=-hcOZ85769Q&feature=youtu.be&desktop_uri=%2Fwatch%3Fv%3D-hcOZ85769Q%26feature%3Dyoutu.be )


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#5 News Feature…

√  “A PRAIRIE HOME COMPANION” SOLD TO LUTHERANS

Though they were too humble to say much about it, Garrison Keillor's joking about the Minnesota Lutherans is probably what prompted them to buy his long-running radio show, "A Prairie Home Companion."

It all happened suddenly, just after lunch, Minnesota time. We do know that the new owners promptly dumped the “Ketchup Advisory Board” as a sponsor, and that’s said to be because they “didn’t appreciate the contentious interaction between the couple who bickered until they got their ketchup.”

The Reverend Farley Fairface said, in reply to a question from the Guide, “That couple needs to settle down. Maybe if they realize there is no such thing as a catsup addiction – and I believe the proper name is ‘catsup – anyway – maybe they can be more calm.”

Rhubarb Pie and Powdermilk Biscuits, two longtime sponsors, are thought to be safe.

Fairface declined to comment on whether there will be changes to the musical character of the show. He did hint that the humor will undergo re-evaluation, but he was unspecific. “It should generate enough heat for the shut-ins in winter, but not enough to get anybody hot to trot after the weather warms-up,” he said.


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#6 News Feature…

√  NEW RECORD NUMBER FOR TV PLAYS OF ANNOYING JINGLE

You’re probably expecting it was set by some old reliable, like Mr. Clean, Coca-Cola, or the Ty-D-Bowl Man, but you’d be wrong. This morning, all those were passed by the ads aired by insufferable ambulance-chasing lawyers.

On L.A. TV, a law firm nobody had heard of just three months ago, came out of nowhere and suddenly every fourth commercial all day and night on CNN and MSNBC was theirs. And all their commercials have the same horrid earworm jingle for the phone number that's all repeating digits, and a babe actress on-screen throughout, with her sly "I've-got-something-you-want" smile.

It goes something like this:

"At Practice & Perfect injury attorneys, we want you to call us. Injured in an accident when your car ran-over an asbestos t-bone wrapped in vaginal mesh? Did it fall-off a truck carrying blood pressure medications that stress you out because you can’t remember to take them with food with specific gmo additives? Does your doctor owe you because he failed to employ clairvoyant psychics to call and tell you to get checked so you could get a prescription for one of those nebulous pills you need to ask your doctor about? Are you seeing this because you watch too much TV, and we need to go after your cable provider? Then grab your phone and hit yourself in the head with it so we can sue your phone company! Drop something on your foot? We'll sue the floor – or gravity. Whatever it is, we're all about making it somebody's fault."

[The blonde adjusts her sly smile once again.]

"You know that hot babes like me only go for guys with lots of money that recently became suddenly rich and have no trouble lavishing on those close to them. Close to them. Really close to them. So why should you be left out? if they're being dicks, call six."

"♪ Practice 'n Perfect, ♪ aam-bue-lance ah-turn-knees, ♪ call six-six-six, ♪ six-six, six-six."

The babe doesn't blow you a kiss. But almost. Then you take your fingers out of your ears, having successfully evaded that damn earworm.

The Guide is considering a class-action suit. We believe plenty of folks would like to sue 'em for blistered ear canals, from all the times we’ve had to insert fingers in ears because of emotional trauma caused by their deluge of irritating commercials. Every fourth commercial. All day, all night.


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#7 News Feature…

√  FIDDLE PLAYER OFFERED PRESIDENCY – OF THE UNIVERSE

This morning, award-winning roots music fiddle player and classic violinist JEAN SUDBURY announced, "I have been offered the job of President of the Universe. There was no end in sight. I turned it down."

Kathie Freeman, who was on-hand for the press conference, quipped, "Who wouldn't?! It would be bad enough being president of the PTA."

The Guide's editor told Sudbury, "The Universe isn't a good gig. Every trip is one-way, because by the time you play a venue again, everybody who was there last time is dead. And their star probably imploded. Now, if Grand Duchess of the Inner Planets is open..."

Jean Sudbury: "Yeah. I could hire all my favorite people to play for the inauguration, maybe on the planet Venus. Who wants to join?"

No word whether the gig would pay union scale.


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#8 News Feature…

√  RED HOUSE RECORDS ANNOUNCES “REDS IN THE HOUSE”

In something of a departure, a new project was announced today by St. Paul, Minnesota-based Red House Records. The label has become the premier label for Nu-Folk artists, and one of the best for rootsy Folk-Americana artists and bands.

Today, Red House announced "Reds in the House: The Lost Tracks of Joseph McCarthy."

Much to the surprise of artists and politicos alike, it seems that “Tail Gunner Joe,” the demagogue red-baiting Senator Joseph McCarty, composed and sang his own songs.

“McCarthy was the senator from Wisconsin, right next door to us,” said a spokesperson for Red House. They continued, “I think this project grew out of a bet on game day when the Badgers played, and someone said something about having to hear their marching band play ‘On Wisconsin’ again.”

No one will confuse McCarthy’s musical efforts with a marching band – even if he did try to ferret-out the timpani players in the band in 1954, “Because the timpani is such a communist instrument.”

When the two-CD box-set is released May 2, the anniversary of McCarthy’s death in 1957, the tracks will include:

♪   “The Communists in the Army Let the Reds Have Germany’s Schnitzel”
♪   “Check Beneath Your Bed, ’Cause I’m Not There to Do It”
♪   “Eisenhower Went Soft (On Communism)”
♪   “The ‘S’ in Harry S Truman Stood for Socialism”
♪   “I Put the ‘God’ in ‘Godless Communists’”
♪   “Don’t Show Me Your Pink, Or I’ll See Red”
♪   “Let MacArthur Do the Nuke Thing”
♪   “I Blacklisted Everybody Smart Enough to Get Me (so they couldn’t)”

Every box set will come complete with its own fireworks display and popup Statue of Liberty with all four faces of Mt. Rushmore superimposed. You’ll also find a miniature gavel, glued firmly into the package, so it can’t be used to gavel-down Joe before the album finishes playing. If you make it to the end, after a few seconds of silence in memory of McCarthy’s victims, the final recorded sound is a voice asking “After all this, Senator, have you left no decency?”

The stable of Red House artists is said to be drawing lots and bribing each other to be the one who reads those final words.


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#9 News Feature…

√  MSNBC CHANGES NAME, KEEPS ABBREVIATION

Controversial NBC affiliate MSNBC was co-founded years ago with MicroSoft when the Redmond, Washington-based software giant had more money than it knew how to spend. At the time, Bill Gates had yet to catch the philanthropy bug.

He was more worried about a congressional investigation into his hegemonistic and monopolistic business practices. So he did what all 1%-ers do: he bought his own media outlet to make the news come out however he wanted. Except he had NBC as a partner, who was owned by GE, who, admidst consumer product safety class-action suits, had their own needs to make the public like them.

MSNBC has never really been a news network, anyway. Not one who is completely objective, with no axes to grind, like, say, Al-Jazeera.

With all the corporate-owned private prisons in America making more and more money as long-term unemployment drives-up crime --  which drives-up conviction rates, which drives-up business -- there was abundant cash to put their product on TV.

The booming private-prison industry spread their cash around. The National Geographic Channel began airing "Inside San Quentin: Where You Always Get Plenty of Towels."

A&E got "Grand Theft Taxpayer," where dumb thugs screamed into the cameras about how they were going to mess-up everybody who put them there, as soon as their early release papers came through.

For the industry, building "an unhealthy spirit of competition to see who could appear the most threateningly satanic" between their cadre of disgusting thug-stars was just good business. It brought higher ad rates for law firms, bail-bondsmen, and pawn shops.

But nobody cashed-in like MSNBC. Their entire weekend was all-incarceration, all the time. For months, every Friday brought Rachel Maddow mixing drinks at the end of her show, preparing her viewers to trade one kind of bars for another, and for a weekend in jail until Monday morning when news suddenly mattered again.

The shows strove for criminal-cutesy, with names like, "Devil's Island: Extended Stay," and "Meth Me Do It -- Again!" and "I'm Gon' Git That Mo' Soon as I 'Scape!" Others fell flat, like, "Finally Finishing High School in the Joint," and "Demonstrable Remorse." The more vile the subject matter, the better the chances MSNBC wanted it to stuff in the face of "those lightweight thugs on NatGeo and A&E."

Still, the network gradually slipped-in some weekend news programs, in a block each morning amidst all the horrific threat-yelling and ugly-ass tattooed freaks behind bars. That change -- like going from steel handcuffs to plastic tie strips -- alarmed the private-prison industry. They were damned mad, actually, feeling betrayed almost as much as alienated as NBC's shrinking pool of "Meet the Press" viewers, who quit due to David Gregory's weekly display of bias.

In an effort to pacify all (except the lost "Meet the Press" viewers ), the network announced today that MSNBC will henceforth be known as "Maximum Sentence NBC." The network says, "Because we're not fooling around. We'll pin those other prison shows to their cots and make them our bitches."



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A note about the veracity of the foregoing “News” section. Please consult the date it was filed: April 1. If that doesn’t explain everything and you’re still inclined to believe you’ve just read the new gospel, ask someone who has more awareness of life.

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♪  TICKET ALERTS...

1)  “LEADERSHIP IN THE ARTS: WHAT DOES IT MEAN?” is a FREE program on Apr 24 at USC, featuring the Kronos Quartet, in the “Visions and Voices” series. Reservations are required, and it will fill-up. Reservations available beginning Tue, April 1, at 9 am, at:
www.visionsandvoices.usc.edu


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2)  The 24th Annual "DYLANFEST" is Sun, May 4th, Noon-8 pm, at the Torrance Cultural Arts Center, outside on the Torino Plaza, 3330 Civic Center Dr, Torrance 90503.
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Early-Bird tickets are available through today, April 1, at the discounted price of $25 adult, $10 child, $100 vip, at:
http://andyandrenee.com/store.php



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♪  TUESDAY’s
LIVE EVENTS
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♪  ONGOING MUSIC & ART EVENTS


Ongoing, through Apr 19, in Sierra Madre:
(Times vary, by night)  “CIVIL WAR THEMED LIVE THEATRE,” in three period-music-related productions, at the Sierra Madre Playhouse, 87 W Sierra Madre Bl, Sierra Madre; 626-355-4318; www.sierramadreplayhouse.com.

Nick Smith, veteran storyteller and co-producer of the Pasadena Folk Music Series (formerly the Caltech Folk Music Series), says, “I’m historical advisor for their current productions. The main one, "Battledrum," (Mar 7-Apr 19) is a short musical drama about drummer boys during the Civil War.”
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There is also one remaining performance of the MUSIC OF THE CIVIL WAR, in a show called "Glory Hallelujah," on April 13. It’s presented in conjunction with the Colbert School of Music, that esteemed L.A. institution across the street from the Disney Concert Hall.
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The theatre’s lobby has a wonderful display of Civil War photographs and descriptive placards, along with a Union uniform and lady’s dress of the time.
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Each performance of "Battledrum" opens with an opening talk by a historian, leading into the play. Nick tells us, “I will be doing [the historian’s opening] for some of the performances. I’m also helping select the readings and music for the other production. It’s been busy.”
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The Guide was there for ""THE PLAYER KING," a one-night-only show in the series on March 28. It’s about the theatrical Booth family, including John Wilkes Booth, the actor who assassinated Abraham Lincoln. Written and performed bt DARIN DAHMS, it is an inspired performance. If it’s indicative of this series, and we believe it is, then catch as much of it as you can.
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Tix and info, at:
http://sierramadreplayhouse.org/playhouse

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Ongoing, through Apr 6,
FILM FESTIVAL,
on Catalina Island:
The Annual “FESTIVAL OF FILM NOIR” at the Avalon Ballroom on Catalina Island. You will need to arrange ferry passage to Catalina Island and back, in addition to choosing tickets for specific films and events. Get event info from the Art Deco Society of Los Angeles: www.adsla.org or 310-659-3326.

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ONGOING at the Getty, through Jun 1, in L.A.:
“JACKSON POLLOCK’S MURAL,” and “HATCHED! CREATING FORM WITH LINE,” are two concurrent temporary exhibitions at the Getty Center, 1200 Getty Center Dr, L.A. 90049; 310-440-7300; parking is $10.

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ONGOING at the Getty, through Jun 8, in L.A.:
“A ROYAL PASSION: QUEEN VICTORIA & PHOTOGRAPHY” and “HIROSHI SUGIMOTO: PAST TENSE” are two concurrent temporary exhibitions at the Getty Center, 1200 Getty Center Dr, L.A. 90049; 310-440-7300; parking is $10.

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ONGOING at the Getty, through Jun 22, in L.A.:
“HEAVEN AND EARTH: BYZANTINE ILLUMINATION AT THE CULTURAL CROSSROADS” is a new temporary exhibition at the Getty Center, 1200 Getty Center Dr, L.A. 90049; 310-440-7300; parking is $10.



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♪  TUESDAY’s Today/Tonight-Only
MUSIC & ART EVENTS
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Tuesday, April 1, 2014
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Tue, Apr 1, in Signal Hill:
6 pm  Weekly “BLUEGRASS SOUP JAM” at Convert-A-Tape, 2420 Gundry Av, Signal Hill 90755.

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Tue, Apr 1, in Long Beach”
7 pm  The world famous OXFORD CHOIR performs FREE aboard the Queen Mary, in the Port of Long Beach. Complimentary admission to the ship will also be provided.
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This free concert is limited to 300 attendees. The famed Oxford Christ Church Boys Choir makes this one-time appearance. The Christ Church Choir, now in its 500th year, is internationally cherished, and like the Queen Mary herself, is undeniably British. Established in 1526, the Oxford Christ Church Choir (http://www.chchchoir.org) brings its heavenly voice to the Queen Mary. Led by Choral Conductor Stephen Darlington, the choir will perform classical and liturgical works in keeping with the Lenten season, as well as adventurous renditions of popular songs. The one-hour exclusive program, beginning at 7 pm, will serve as an early introduction to Easter.
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The Queen Mary seeks to align its marketing and community relations activities with those cultural opportunities which reflect the ship's British heritage and its own stature as an historical icon. The Christ Church Choir itself reflects these same attributes. "Making this wonderful and historic Choir available to school groups, local choirs and all music lovers again demonstrates the Queen Mary's commitment to broadening the public's understanding of British culture, be it in song or the mid-century engineering masterpiece that is our ship," says Julie Guaderrama, Event Marketing Manager for the Queen Mary.
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The Queen’s Salon is the ship's most elegant public space, replete with precious Art Deco fittings and a permanent stage. Originally serving as the First Class Lounge, the Salon features a "music theme" clearly reflected by the artwork displayed throughout the space. The striking gesso panel "Unicorns in Battle" by Bayes/Oakley dominates the entire Salon - its gold reflection adding luster to any event. "The acoustics, art and thematic history of the Salon can only enhance what we know will be a an emotional and stirring performance by the Christ Church Choir. We look forward to sharing their artistry and historical significance and encourage those interested to reserve early," Ms. Guaderrama concluded.
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While many famed soloists, orchestras and other entertainers have graced the Queen Mary's stage this performance by the Christ Church Choir is a first for the ship. The Queen Mary is grateful to Director Stephen Darlington and the choir members for their amazing range, repertoire and for bringing such beautiful British voices to our historic Salon. Here is a chance to hear centuries-old tradition herald the coming of Easter in song; and to cherish the legacy that is Britain and of course her pride - the Queen Mary. The Choir’s rare Southern California tour will also include performances in Los Angeles and at Casa Romantica in San Clemente.
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Doors and seating open at 6 pm. Make your required FREE reservation at:
www.queenmary.com/oxford.

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Tue, Apr 1, in Arcadia:
7 pm  Weekly "SONGWRITERS SERENADE" tonight brings a lineup of recording artists and performing host JC HYKE, all playing fully acoustic, at Matt Denny's Ale House Restaurant, 145 E Huntington Dr, Arcadia 91006.
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No cover. Venue has full menu and full bar. All ages. Show is on a covered patio with plenty of heaters. Free parking in back or on the street.

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Tue, Apr 1, in SFV (Toluca Lake):
7 pm  Weekly “TRADITIONAL IRISH MUSIC SESSION” is a structured jam at Timmy Nolan's Tavern & Grill, 10111 Riverside Dr, Toluca Lake 91602; 818-985-3359.

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Tue, Apr 1, in San Diego Co (Escondido):
7 pm  Monthly “NORTH COUNTY BLUEGRASS & FOLK CLUB” music session at Round Table Pizza, 1161 E Washington Av (at Ash), Escondido 92025.

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Tue, Apr 1, in Carson:
7:30 pm  RICHARD SMITH, virtuoso fingerstyle guitar great, plays the Printing Museum, 315 Torrance Bl, Carson 90745; 310-515-7166.

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Tue, Apr 1, in San Diego:
7:30-11 pm  An unnamed CAJUN CREOLE BAND plays Tio Leos, 5302 Napa St, San Diego 92110.

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Tue, Apr 1, in WeHo:
Time tba  THE ICY HOT CLUB plays “Jazz Tuesdays” at the Moonrise Club in West Hollywood.
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The Icy Hot Club is a Los Angeles-based group that plays modernized Gypsy Jazz music in the style of Django Reinhardt. They often include reworked versions of contemporary pop and rock songs alongside traditional Gypsy Swing, with 3 part vocal harmonies. Generally bringing two guitars, in the hands of Ethan Emerson and Ray Bergstrom, and an upright bass, Icy Hot Club might add violin, clarinet, and / or drums.

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Tue & Wed, Apr 1 & 2, in OC (Costa Mesa):
8 pm  CELTIC WOMAN performs two shows in their “EMERALD TOUR” at Segerstrom Center for the Arts, 600 Town Center Dr, Costa Mesa 92626.
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They’ve been at it long enough that this tour is about not only performing new songs, but also fan favorites.
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Tix, 714-556-2121, or online at www.SCFTA.org

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Tue, Apr 1, in Altadena:
8 pm  STRING FEVER plays the Coffee Gallery Backstage, 2029 N Lake Av, Altadena.
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The Guide’s editor was there, in the story below. Everything that venue impresario Bob Stane says about this band is true. They are incredible. Truly.
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Bob Stane tells this so well, we’ll just present the story as he tells it:
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“I have pulled you aside after a show. I have you firmly by the elbow and am whispering in your ear.... This is the first time in 15 years that I have sent you an e mail message on just one act. One Act.

“I want those of you who realize what is happening to experience this act." DO NOT MISS THIS SHOW. THIS IS SOMETHING ELSE !!!
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“The group is STRING FEVER. This is the story and it rings of fantasy but here it is. Here is the way it happened. 3 years ago. I get this message from ‘someone’ and it states... there is this English group and they want to come in from London to play The Coffee Gallery Backstage. Right!!! No, no says ‘someone’ they will be in on this particular night and they want to play your stage. An opening slot will be just fine. 35 minutes is all they want. Right!!! They will fly in from Heathrow Airport in London to LAX, rent a car and drive to Altadena. Of Course They Will !!! Bob Says, ‘and then what will they do?’ ‘Someone’ says, ‘they will do their 35 minutes, then drive to Las Vegas and talk to some "people" and then fly back to London.’ Right !!!
+
"’Someone’ says, ‘and you will not have to pay them. They will not have an American work permit.’ 6,000 miles, no other venue and no pay. Works for me.
+
“Having just purchased a turnip farm in rich Florida swamp land, I can go for this.
+
“How tight will their schedule be between landing at LAX and arriving at The Coffee Gallery Backstage? About 2 hours. They feel they will have 30 minutes to spare. From Heathrow to LAX to The Coffee Gallery Backstage with a fat, 30 minutes to spare. Right !!! So they can play for 35 minutes.
+
“They could have flown directly to Las Vegas but the lusted to play The Coffee Gallery Backstage. No other place in Los Angeles would do just here in famous Altadena. In the glamorous Coffee Gallery Backstage. Where else could such dreams be realized?
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“So I bullied the headline act scheduled that night to let this strange and wonderful English group open the show. 35 minutes for a 6,000 mile trip to play this cozy bistro coffee emporium showroom in Altadena, CA. The things that dreams are made from in England. California dreaming and then back home.
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“Stranger things happen but they showed up, as promised, dressed in the clothes they left England in to arrive with 30 minutes to spare. They broke out the instruments they were going to play which looked like the stuff in the cabaret scene in Star Wars and discovered that some of the electrified instruments had English plugs and were not adapted to American current. But the show must go on and it did. Things got adapted and the most wonderful things happened. STRING FEVER may, arguably, be the most complete act that has ever played The Coffee Gallery Backstage in 15 years.
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“Strings...wow !!! Strings of all kinds. Everything that can be plucked and bowed. Classical, folk, Beatles, Pop. And humor like you cannot believe. Choreography as a venue owner only can dream of. They did it all. I have never seen a show like that in my life. A complete stint as you would only expect in a Broadway or Vegas show if they had the taste to book it. And, of course, they got a standing and extended encore and no one wanted them to leave the stage. The headliner, a fine music and comedy act, might as well have packed up and left without playing. No one could follow STRING FEVER.”
+
Bob adds, “I have tried to get them back for three years and finally, they caved in. But we only have them on a Monday, April 1. And they only wanted to charge $18. Believe me this is a $50 act. Snap them up at $18. You will never get this price again. And you get the full length concert show. All of it.”
+
Check them out and play the YouTube video, at:
www.youtube.com/watch?_v=H5MLNMgpywk
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Much more on their website, at:
www.stringfever.co.uk
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Tix, $18. Reservations, 626-798-6236, 10 am-10 pm, seven days. There’s more on the venue’s website, at www.coffeegallery.com

++++++

Tue, Apr 1, in L.A.:
8 pm  “THE BLUEGRASS SITUATION” kicks-off its new series at The Mint L.A. with THE CERNY BROTHERS and DUSTBOWL REVIVAL, with a free launch at the Mint, 6010 W Pico Bl, L.A.; 323-954-9630;  HYPERLINK http://www.themintla.com www.themintla.com.
+
No cover.

++++++

Tue, Apr 1, in Palm Desert:
8 pm  JOHN ANDERSON and TRACY LAWRENCE, two wildly successful country music singer-songwriters, play the wonderful McCallum Theatre, 73000 Fred Waring Dr, Palm Desert 92260; 760-340-ARTS or 866-889-ARTS.

++++++

Tue, Apr 1, in Burbank:
8 pm  “JOHN PISANO’S GUITAR NIGHT” welcomes talented pre-booked guests to a series that always brings quite a lineup of virtuosic players, every time they do this, at Viva Cantina, 900 Riverside Dr (next to L.A. Equestrian Center), Burbank; 818-845-2425 or 818-515-4444;  HYPERLINK "http://www.vivacantina.com/" www.vivacantina.com.
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No cover. Venue is known for its Mexican food and full bar. Okay to park free across the street at Pickwick Bowl (free, nearly unlimited parking for Viva patrons).

++++++

Tue, Apr 1, in SFV (Chatsworth):
8 pm  DEBRA LEE & THE TRIGGER HAPPY play the Cowboy Palace, 21635 Devonshire St, Chatsworth; 818-341-0166.
+
This is L.A.’s last real honky tonk. No cover, full bar, lots of fun. Go early for the nightly free dance lesson.



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♪  MUSIC-on-TV


Tue, Apr 1, on KCET Link:
8-9:30 pm  “CELTIC THUNDER: HERITAGE” is the 2011 PBS special with the big, talented Irish troupe.

+ = +

Tue, Apr 1, on Smithsonian TV:
8-9 pm  “CHATEAU OF VERSAILLES” is a 2014 episode of “MUSEUM SECRETS REVEALED” that’s not about music, but is waaay cool, anyway. (Repeats 11 pm-midnight.)

+ = +

Tue, Apr 1, on KLCS TV:
9-10 pm  “SOSUA: MAKE A BETTER WORLD” (2012) is a journey through the crafting of a musical by Dominican and Jewish teens in NYC’s Washington Heights, about Jewish refugees in the Dominican Republic during WWII. (Repeats 4-5 am.)

+ = +

Tue, Apr 1, on KCET Link:
9-11 pm  “JOE BONAMASSA: TOUR DE FORCE” brings the singer-guitarist in a 2013 PBS special from four famous London venues. (Repeats 12:30-2 am.)

+ = +

Tue, Apr 1, on TCM:
9:30-10:45 pm  “STEAMBOAT BILL Jr.” (1928) is a silent classic comedy (that is to say, a film with a musical soundtrack) with Buster Keaton.

+ = +

Tue, Apr 1, on Ovation TV:
10:30 pm-12:30 am  “MR. ROCK ‘N’ ROLL: ALAN FREED” (1999) is the music biopic that brings Judd Nelson in the title role as the real-life Cleveland DJ who introduced the masses to a new kind of music in the 1950s.

+ = +

Tue, Apr 1, on TCM:
10:45-11:45 pm  “THE KID” (1921) is a silent classic comedy-drama (that is to say, a film with a musical soundtrack) with Charlie Chaplin and Jackie Coogan.

+ = +

Tue, Apr 1, on Palladia TV:
11 pm-midnight  MUMFORD & SONS and JEFF LYNNE are among the performers on this 2012 edition of LATER… WITH JOOLS HOLLAND."

+ = +

Tue, Apr 1, on KCET Link:
11 pm-12:30 am  “SEBASTIAN SIDI: STREET TO STAGE” (2013) profiles the self-taught musician, explaining how he’s succeeded in the business without management or a record label, and includes footage from his sold-out concert at the Downey Civic Theatre in Downey, CA. (Repeats 2-3:30 am.)

+ = +

Tue, Apr 1, on Smithsonian TV:
11 pm-midnight  “CHATEAU OF VERSAILLES” is a 2014 episode of “MUSEUM SECRETS REVEALED” that’s not about music, but is waaay cool, anyway.

+ = +

Tue night / Wed AM, Apr 1 / 2, on Palladia TV:
Midnight-1 am  NORAH JONES, JACK WHITE, and THE ALABAMA SHAKES are among the performers on this 2012 edition of LATER… WITH JOOLS HOLLAND."

+ = +

Tue night / Wed AM, Apr 1 / 2, on KCET Link:
12:30-2 am  “JOE BONAMASSA: TOUR DE FORCE” brings the singer-guitarist in a 2013 PBS special from four famous London venues.

+ = +

Tue night / Wed AM, Apr 1 / 2, on KCET Link:
2-3:30 am  “SEBASTIAN SIDI: STREET TO STAGE” (2013) profiles the self-taught musician, explaining how he’s succeeded in the business without management or a record label, and includes footage from his sold-out concert at the Downey Civic Theatre in Downey, CA.

+ = +

Tue night / Wed AM, Apr 1 / 2, on KLCS TV:
4-5 am   “SOSUA: MAKE A BETTER WORLD” (2012) is a journey through the crafting of a musical by Dominican and Jewish teens in NYC’s Washington Heights, about Jewish refugees in the Dominican Republic during WWII. (Repeats 4-5 am.)



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More, soon, as always.
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♪  The Guide will be making CH-CH-CHANGES – turn, embrace the change -- in 2014. Some folks will like some, others will not. There will be points of departure to make room (and time) for the new. We’ll do what we can, because as always, we operate with the editor’s motto, “One does what one can.”

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CONTACT US / Questions / Comments / SUBSCRIBE to our notices, etc., all at
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Lawrence Wines & Tied to the Tracks.
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Monday, April 1, 2013

April Fool's News

Some things you can't make up. Like how mainstream media had a field day with Justin Bieber's monkey being detained at the airport. Should have been an April Fool's joke. Wasn't. We really didn't care, either way.

In other news...

Webster's and Funk & Wagnall's are adding a new definition:
Perfect Pitch -- What happens when the banjo clears the sides of the dumpster and lands squarely on the accordion.

Okay, the hate mail is on the way... trenches already dug. Incoming!

The Guide's regular readers know we have taken issue with Google for its universal spyware, used to track everything you do and compile it into a cyber dossier on you, for sale to anyone who wants to buy it. And that's no fooling.

Still, there are two sides to Google and other web giants -- the mercenary exploitive business cutthroats who would sell grandma, and the clever creative types they want us to see. On April Fool's Day, we'll look at the latter. Feel free to read all you want into that.

Today's annual day of hijinks, practical jokes and spoofs included Google's announcement of the launch of "Google Nose," to allow users to search for smells -- all kinds of smells, including "wet dog" and "horse manure." Google announced it would shut-down YouTube to launch the scent-based search engine.

Meanwhile, the jokesters at YouTube claimed they were shutting-down so they would have the time and resources available to determine "the greatest video ever uploaded."

There's more. The G-people revealed that Google Maps is adding a "treasure map mode" to help you find the hidden treasure of pirate Captain Kidd. (Hey, you can run the magnetic strip on credit cards with your phone, so why not a detector for buried gold and silver, linked to gps?)

On Facebook, Karen Nash's page reported, "Any posts of Bob Seger's songs, even links from other sites, will result in a 12 hour suspension of service. We are sorry for any inconvenience, but Mr. Zuckerberg's father is a huge Bob Seger fan and tortured him when he was growing up by playing Bob Seger non-stop. While this might seem unfair, Facebook is free and threatening to sue us will get you nowhere."

The April Fools Day pranks got an early start on Sunday, when Google Analytics users saw web traffic from the International Space Station. The number of astronauts aboard the ISS who were simultaneously viewing a user’s page suddenly totaled 41. That's 4-1, representing April 1.

That's an attempt to mine comedy from the disgraceful collapse of the space program (more of the damage inflicted in the name of budget austerity and cutbacks): the ISS holds a maximum of a half-dozen or so astronauts and cosmonauts at any one time, and since the end of Space Shuttle flights, there's no way to get more than three people there or back.

But we don't want to leave you on a serious note today. So we'll cite the national April Fool's joke that runs all year: Congress.

Add YOUR favorite April Fool's News in our reader comments (just below) to share with others.
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7 comments:

Anonymous said...

Thought you people LIKED banjo. If you didn't have the banjo art picture up now, us pickers and grinners would have to act offended.
Leo

April 02, 2013
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Anonymous said...

It isnt the bieber monkey that is the joke. Its the very idea that he can sing. With all that computer alteration you dont even know if that is a human voice. - Sue

April 02, 2013
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Anonymous said...

You're a politically astute individual yet u missed the gag on wh.gov! Check it out.
Billy

April 02, 2013
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Anonymous said...

Landed on the accordion? Assaulted by a banjo! Poor accordion! Michelle

April 02, 2013
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Anonymous said...

Totally concur that best (worst) April Fool joke IS Congress. They are so pathetic and won't even cut their own big salaries for their part time jobs (they're always off, traveling at our expense) and they did'nt cut their big offic

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Contents copyright (c) 2013, 2022, Lawrence Wines and Tied to the Tracks. All rights reserved.

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The ACOUSTIC AMERICANA MUSIC GUIDE endeavors to bring you NEWS and views of interest to artists everywhere, more specifically to musicians and the creative community, and music makers and fans of acoustic and Folk-Americana music, both traditional and innovative. We provide a wealth of resources, including a HUGE catalog of acoustic-friendly venues, and schedules of performances in Southern California venues large and small. We cover workshops and other events for artists and folks in the music industry, and all kids o’ things in the world of acoustic and Americana and accessible classical music. From washtub bass to musical spoons to oboe to viola to banjo to squeezebox, from Djangostyle to new-fangled-old-time string band music, from sweet Cajun fiddle to pre-bluegrass Appalachian mountain music to proto blues.
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The Acoustic Americana Music Guide. We’re on it.
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